I was having some issues with boost which I found was a badly secured hose, as a matter of course whilst in the engine bay I checked the oil, to my horror I pulled out the dipstick to find that it was halfway up the dipstick and seemed 'watery'. Wiped the dipstick to look properly and it was way above the full mark.

I only checked it about a week ago and it was fine! I haven't lost any coolant whatsoever (could it be fuel?) and the oil is normal colour, not obviously different other than seeming watery - it drips off the stick much more than usual.

I'm confused and very concerned about driving it in this condition. Any advice on what this could be and if it is damaging to drive?

Does it smell of fuel?

Aye it sounds like diesel getting in.

bore wash etc from bad injector or overfuelling.

As above does it smell of fuel?

what engine is it?

1.8 turbo petrol 150hp. I've dumped the oil out of it tonight, its black as the night and still seems watery. It doesn't smell of petrol at all and there is absolutely no white emulsion/Mayo so I don't think its water now.

The other thing is I think the water pump may have gone, the full story is this...

The water pump has 'whirred' since i bought it 2 years ago. I went to start it friday and it appeared to have a flat battery, i just managed to start it using a bit of throttle but when driving something didnt feel right. I thought it was boost/loose hose as I had similar problem recently, so i tickled it 4 miles to pick my neice up. Left it to cool down (unintentionally) as I was in their house. Started perfectly but decided to tickle it home as I felt something was wrong.

Next day I check boost hoses, replaced a suspect clamp and check the oil as a matter of course and its literally halfway up length of dipstick!! I changed the oil 300 miles/2 months ago (castrol gtx magnetec fully synthetic), and checked it last week and it was fine. I noted that it was a little darker brown than previous check as would be expected.

I don't know if this makes any sense but although I haven't fully overheated the engine due to the short journey, it seems like the oil has reached a critical temperature and expanded and gone watery?! Its like hot oil but its cold.

Obviously next logical step is to check water pump, but I'd be very interested in opinions on my theory...?

Have you checked for circulatory flow at the expansion bottle?

Thermostat might need looked at.

never heard of oil having this effect, if its gtx magnatec and its 5w30 when warm this stuff is like water. If it dont smell of petrol and has no mayo, in my opinion it cant grow like that.

dont mean to sound condesending, but you do fill it and check it after 5 minutes on level ground dont you?

Yes, as I said I changed the oil 2 months ago, and I check it regularly, cold and on level ground. It was normal last week. This is weird.

I thought that it might just be the thin oil, but its like the viscosity of hot oil when its cold, however I've only checked this oil in colder weather until this weekend when it was warmer - could make a difference? I've checked the see through container I put it in to settle this morning. Nothing separated out so I'm fairly certain there's no contamination.

Maybe something else has caused it to shoot up the dipstick and the residue is what was giving the high reading when wiped? Gonna do filter change and fresh oil tonight and check water pump. Need to find some relatively cheap oil cuz its likely I'm gonna dump it again.

No lofty, not condescending at all by the way - I've been racking my brains trying to think if I've done something stupid, it wouldn't be the first time!

Someone at work suggested blocked crankcase breather, causing build up of pressure in the sump. Sounds logical but I've had all the breathers off recently when I was having MOT emission fail (turned out to be an empty cat) but i'll be checking more on the weekend.

Got a new filter&cheapish oil tonight from gsf but too dark to do it. Job for before work in the morning :-(

I still keep coming back to why the oil has suddenly gone so black - like years old black if u get me. Brings me back to either overheating or fuel in the oil which would be a good carbon cleaner.

So new oil tomorrow and water circulation check, whilst keeping an eye on the temp gauge. I've got vagcom and showing no codes but I don't know if overheating, low/high oil pressure or level, or water pump failure would throw up a code?

New oil and filter. 4.5 litres came out, 4.5 litres went in, so there definitely isn't any a large amount of water/fuel in the oil, and no sign of contamination visually or by smell either.

Took 3 good attempts to start, not sure why was just cranking over for ages. Only change is I had the cambelt cover off looking for the water pump. Anyway after eventually starting it ticks over fine, no warning lights etc. All seems normal apart from the 'whirring' (I always thought was water pump for last 2 years) has definitely dissapeared. Heaters were warm within a couple of minutes and water pipes were warm so I assume water pump is working. + I assume since its cam driven if the bearings fail the pully falls out or engine stops turning.

Anybody ever heard of

1) a problem with the dipstick - I.e. oil getting up it past the first orange plastic bit

2) a bad batch of oil. I definitely wasn't imagining the 'wateryness'I've never had oil drip off a dipstick like that before.

Will have to see if I get the same thing when I drive it round the block tomorrow, didn't fancy it tonight in case I had an issue.