And there's an awful lot of bird crap on the boot lid.

I'd be ashamed.

Very ashamed.

When I acquired said Beemer that started this, the most dubious of threads, I was buying it from a garage in Broughty Ferry, near Dundee. I live twixt Brecon and Builth Wells, a distance of some 400 miles.

"Nae bother" sez the Salesman - "Ah'll deliver it fur ye!". And, get this, no further cost at all. "Michty me!" I muttered in dialect, "Dinnae fash yersel aboot yon!"

So I didn't fash myself.

Then I told him that I could not afford the balance until my dear departed - and recently departed - old Mither's Estate was wound up.

"Ach - Dinnae bother yersel aboot that, ye ken" he said, thickly, "You'se kin gie us whits left whan ye huv it!"

And so, I had a 53 plate Z4 2.5i with a fair few extras delivered a couple of weeks later despite him losing all sense of direction and tomtoming about in the hills and valleys - and did not actually pay for it for four further months.

Like the laughing policeman, I have met a benevolent garage - to my benefit!

Trusting, or what............(mind, they'd dealt with my old Ma and Pa for many a year, and that seemed to count for something).

And there's an awful lot of bird crap on the boot lid.

Bird crap be damned - that's a reflection of something in the bright shiny paintwork.

Huh!

Sez you!

What do I miss in the Beemer from the Yeti?

I miss the hill hold feature. I miss a sixth gear ratio. I miss a well directed system for heating/aircon that points where I need it pointing. And I miss the ability to flick the indicator stalk and it does three flashes.

What do you miss in your compensation-mobile?

What do you miss in your compensation-mobile?

Quite a lot actually as Magnus is bare bones... he has heated leather seats, electric mirrors, central locking, alarm and a radio. No AC. So everything else from the Yeti I miss (PDC, HH, Bi-Xenons, bendy lights, etc, etc... ) LOL But do I miss these roof down? Never! That is the whole point of such a car.

There is another way to express (some of) your middle aged fantasies without risking comments when out driving - and that is to have a car as 'a project'. My MX5 has been a work in progress for a year now. There's so much that needs, or I want, to be done that there's very little chance of it being on the road this year either! Plus all the time its off the road I save on tax and insurance.

My Pug 207cc has most of the Yeti toys (leather upholstery/trim is even two-tone and extends to the fascia: it's the Roland Garros special edition) but it lacks a heated front screen (not really a problem in Provence!), sat nav (I've bought a Garmin which we use both in the Pug and in my wife's SX4), hill hold and park assist. But it does have a spare wheel, dual-zone AC, rear parking sensors, automatic lights (bendy at the front) and washers etc.- and, of course, the folding roof, which never fails to gain an open-mouthed audience even when there are so many of them around these days. All in all, a sweet little number. I just hope it starts on Saturday morning, having sat unused in my garage since the end of March!

My MG has no toys. No electric gizmos, no AC (barely even a fan) no power steering, and even the radio doesn't work. Putting up the hood involves first of all manually assembling a frame, then pulling the hood over it and clipping it into place. However, since I generally only drive it in the dry, the hood spends most of its time in the boot.

No fripperies ... just the throbbing at idle, and then the roar of acceleration you only get with a V8.

just the throbbing at idle, and then the roar of acceleration you only get with a V8.

I had a V8 RR many years ago and would drive it along county lanes with the windows open just to listen to that lovely Rover V8. I also had the SD1 with a manual gearbox and that V8 as well

I had a V8 RR many years ago and would drive it along county lanes with the windows open just to listen to that lovely Rover V8. I also had the SD1 with a manual gearbox and that V8 as well

Blodwen's engine and gearbox are lifted straight from an SD1, topped off with a Holley carburettor. There's a narrow street not far from me, lined with parked expensive German cars. I've been known to drive slowly along it, occasionally blipping the throttle, which is usually enough to set of half a dozen alarms. ASBODOG

My MG has no toys. No electric gizmos, no AC (barely even a fan) no power steering, and even the radio doesn't work. Putting up the hood involves first of all manually assembling a frame, then pulling the hood over it and clipping it into place. However, since I generally only drive it in the dry, the hood spends most of its time in the boot.

No fripperies ... just the throbbing at idle, and then the roar of acceleration you only get with a V8.

That's all you need.

Hello Bobdog,Graham,Johann, Freshacre,Andrew, Boss Fox, Rockhopper et al (what happened to Terfyn?) Jubilee Greetings to you all not been on here for a while!

This is what you want for summer in the country, my mates Moss with a 2L Vitesse engine. 10 miles in this is enough, like riding on a skateboard and just enough room for 2 and two small crown green bowls bags!

PS not me in the photo but German friends and my drinking pal and his missus.

Anyway Wonderwoman retires on Friday and we are off next week on Yorkies 25 day Euro ferry and roadtrip to Luxembourg,Interlaken,Garda, Zell am Zee and 2 nights with our German friends in the Taunus hills on the way back.

Well, my RS2000 has a sun roof, 4 wheel drive, electric windows, power steering and....... well that's bout it really, but no air con, no bendy lights, no leather seats, no turbo, no hill hold or hill descent, no stability control, no traction control, no tax, no MOT, no annual mileage...... I must finish fixing it and get it back on the road, it's just had its second anniversary of SORN. At least it's not depreciating!

What do you miss in your compensation mobile

7.0 l/100k

Unfortunately off the road at the moment, needs 4 new tyres and a new slush box. A respra wouldn't go amiss either.