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Every prisoner applying for early release should name a sponsor from the parole board who will ensure the prisoner complies with ALL factors of his parole - any transgressions and the sponsor completes the sentence. Doubt if many would volunteer for that task. Another thing - hold the parole meeting in a very warm room, then all the snowflakes would melt away.

On my 2018 Fabia, I can specify 12 or 24 hour clock. Hope this helps

Oh No!! That poor snowflake hasn't got its water wings on.

They'll all be deaf anyway ?

In Rocky ?

High Tide @ 9.40 so should be OK for sandcastles & paddling.

No, don't! I've got a box set of paint-drying thrillers to watch tonight.

Imagine it's to do with MOT Test - If your car fails, you become a pedestrian until it's fixed ?

Unless they arrived on the Windrush !

Enough of this tittle-tattle, what did Corbin have to say about the tragic loss of a terrorist ?

From Citigo: " An old favourite when the pipe freezes. It 'pops' the connector and leaks until it's reconnected. Sorry, no knowledge of Citigo - but seems to be a Skoda 'trademark' bit like next door's tom cat "

An old favourite when the pipe freezes. It 'pops' the connector and leaks until it's reconnected. Sorry, no knowledge of Citigo - but seems to be a Skoda 'trademark'

The snag with washing up liquid is the SALT !

Probably indulging in the traditional West Riding winter sport of ' light your own wind ' ?

Must be second cousin of the Oozlum Bird ?

His new wheels are based in Harlow.

W S T M Well said that man!

Didn't they call it ' Tory Lite ' ?

A few weeks ago, the Tory grandees met to discuss their campaign. They started by dusting off a Monopoly game. Just as the generals had 'written off' millions of lives trying to attain supremacy, our faithful few decided an all out offensive against the Labour 'Red Wall' was the way to go. This tactic succeeded, in spades. their overall numbers only increased by a fraction, but it was WHERE the gains were made that was so decisive.

Guido Fowkes is Back ?

. . and cancel the removal van.

Election Topic locked until 10pm, says " use Referendum Topic." Referendum Topic says " Use Election Topic " Thought for the Day: "

Get it on Skoda PCP and when your insurance ( it was comp. wasn't it? ) pay it off. 7.4% for a few weeks is nowt compared with suffering a mere FORD !

Oxford University researchers have discovered the densest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called pillocks. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass. When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many pillocks but twice as many morons. After Governmentium is past it’s uselessness it transforms into geriatrium and moves to Another Place where it becomes somnolentium until it can no longer change and thankfully ceases to exist. nb: this whole shebang is going critical a week tomorrow !