BLURT !

[@Lee]

wuuuuule number one, blurt for offence onry, wuuuuuule number two, firrrrrst rurn wule number one

[@Lee]

does anyone here have a No! No!. They're advertised during the day by some Emmy award nominated non entity I've never heard of. Anyway, the question; do they work on scrotal hair? I only ask as mine are forming dreadlocks and could do with a trim. So, No! No!, yes or no no?

[Longyear]

Mr Miyagi writes a bloody fantastic best man's speech!

Daniel Larussa was ****e ........ he wasn't there when it was his turn to speak: turns out he was getting the crap beaten out of him in the toilets.

Edited 18 June, 2012 by Longyear

[RainbowFire]

How come, when it's midnight and Cinderella's stuff disappears, does "the shoe" remain? :S

[@Lee]

she left a shoe? Can I have a sniff.

[Longyear]

A mate of mine was there, and reckoned it's because the shoe wasn't actually glass.... it was made of that P.E.T stuff that plastic pop bottles are made out of, and it can't biodegrade and break down, not even in a fairy tale .......

....... oh and he said the shoe stunk..... he said Cinders may have the looks but she also clearly has athletes foot, because the pong was positively fungicidal.

And you know what they say....... smelly shoes, smelly _ _ _ _ _

.

Edited 18 June, 2012 by Longyear

[stever750]

It was worse out there than the top of alpe d'huez this evening, and only three days from midsummer. What a **** country.

[SkodaTC]

Turn over your papers and begin.

[Harvey1978]

Time to fit cctv in my bedroom, I keep finding SWMBOs hair wapped around my balls, I think she may be trying to castrate me

[Aspman]

Said the actress to the bishop

[RainbowFire]

Now, you might very well think that: but of course, I couldn't possibly comment.

[richie]

I am allways correct, rule 1. In the event of me being wrong, see rule 1, thats rule 2.

[spinna]

Xylophone Buggery

[SkodaTC]

I'll be away from my computer the next couple of days, my blurts would have been:

...I swear, it's an optical illusion.

She was as disappointed with the Isle of Man as I was with Lesbos.

Every second Friday until September (weather permitting).

Nearly fainted when he told me the price!

Something about monkey's bottoms and where not to have your butler serviced etc etc

[Aspman]

Blurt Reynold's moustache, slightly damp and smelling of wee

[richie]

This is my rifle, there are many like it, but this one is mine.....

[giandougl]

I'm hiding inside my shadow, hope the sun stays out, otherwise people will see me. LOL

[B33fy]

Miss...Miss...please Miss, show us on the doll where the headmaster touched you...

[richie]

Thats better!! Is my type choice OK with you all??

[Longyear]

....and Ben Kenobi leaned over to the Stormtrooper and quietly whispered...... people ignore you because you speak to loudly to them. The louder the voice, the less the impact.

[swordstoke]

What do you get for pretending the danger's not real?

[richie]

Ssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!! The footies on!!

[Aspman]

O Negative and it's all mine!

[@Lee]

this is my penis, there are many like it (so she said), but this one is mine.

[@Lee]

In the tube hole true Blonde going back to Romford - Mega mega mega going back to Romford - Hi mom are you having fun - And now are you on your way To a new tension headache