If I wanted to give an idea of how this car feels like to drive I would have to say: "think of the Superb ok? and now turn everything that you've thought upside down and you're starting to get there" (both good and bad, that is)
For starters, it's a 2016 manual (10 years since my last manual car...) 231bhp JCW. But it also had two crucial upgrades: It's on Eibach springs (saved me the trouble of doing that myself, car looks just perfect) and a valved Remus non-resonated cat-back ☺️ (I appreciated that modification more than I ever thought was important for me) . Previous owner had also ditched the awful stock run-flats for PS4's. Oh yes, and it's red with black roof. I would not buy many cars in red, actually it's the colour I was always steering away first from in all my previous cars but there's something about this caricature of a car (because that's what it really is) that makes it look so right on it. In fact i think it was one of the reasons to go for it after I saw it in the flesh thinking "i should just have some fun this time without over-thinking everything...:
Now, as "cute" as it may look to some on the outside, it is completely the opposite when you're inside. First off, the engine sets of with a massive "VROOOOMMMM" and if it's doing its cold start and you have the valves open it sounds outright brutal. Not cheap, fake, or loud, but rather proper angry and purposeful, as if it was always that way. Then there's the steering wheel and clutch that are so heavy and so old-school feeling compared to most other modern cars and especially to what you think such a small car must feel like that it's giving you smiles before even taking it up to speed. Set off and you feel everything in your fingers, butt and ears, from road anomalies to how the engine is firing (probably an after-effect of the open valve and non-res exhaust that turns it into a straight piped setup after the cat...). Gear shifter slots in so nicely I found myself enjoying the very thing I was once mocking when people were on about "the pleasure of shifting your own gears". Probably not equally enjoyable in a manual Astra but in this car it completely makes sense. Suspension is definitely on the firm side but not crashy. My Fabia vRS on H&R springs and Bilstein B8s was punishing on imperfect surfaces but this one no.
And then you arrive at your first corner and the real appeal of the car becomes apparent. The immediacy of the steering and the response/lack of resistance of the whole car to your input is hard to describe and hard to expect. There's a new (to me) feeling that the car does not steer front first then rear follows but from somewhere between the steering wheel and the back of the seat, almost exactly where you're sitting, with front and rear rigidly connected as one piece. It takes a while to get used to it. At first I was either applying more lock than it really needed or I was cornering at a much slower speed than the car could take the corner in, you need to delete your old thresholds of inertia, grip etc. and re-calibrate yourself to it. Seating position is great. Car is already low and by picking a low position also, you feel you could reach out for the road with your hand. Coupled with the excellent support from the buckets this allows you to push with even more confidence the more you learn the car.
The day I returned home i took it straight to a "reference" b-road nearby despite having driven 350km to get back as I couldn't wait to try it in a suitable environment and boy did I have some good time... Exhaust valves fully open and the engine noise turning from a throaty to sharp, racecar-like tone as it approached 6K rpm, (Remus really has nailed it with this setup, didn't expect it from a 4-pot), steering wheel throwing everything that was on the road at my palms, focus on the shift, slot it in, MASSIVE pops and bangs on every lift-off, repeat!
Prior driving it, I though it would be similar to the GTI Clubsport DSG I owned before the Superb, but it is a completely different experience. The GTI was so efficient but at the same time it would feel like a standard Golf when you were not driving it at 9/10. I now realized the DSG also made much of the driving "automatic" (pun intended). This one shows its true character as soon as you start it up, it demands your attention even to reverse it and encourages you to thrash it at the first chance you get. It's firmer, noisier, less refined, and with much less comforts and gadgets than I have had for some time. With its retro, analog styling it feels more like a restomod for the track than a 2016 car, auto folding mirrors and rear cam you say? it doesn't even have CarPlay! But i don't care. For now it is giving me all that I've missed for some time in huge amounts. Will it at some point become tiring? I don't know but then again, it doesn't have to be driven everywhere all the time (although for now I do want to drive it everywhere 😆) as there's another ordinary and much friendlier car available. So yes, happy times.
Some photos: